Understanding Abuse

What is Domestic & Family Violence?

Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner in an intimate relationship to maintain power or control over another partner.

Family violence is any act committed by one household member that is intended to threaten or harm another family/household member.

What are the Forms of Abuse?

Abuse is not always just physical. It can appear in many forms including emotional, verbal, financial, sexual, and spiritual. Let's take a look at each of these categories:

PHYSICAL ABUSE

EMOTIONAL & VERBAL ABUSE

Emotional and Verbal Abuse is a pattern of actions and words that cause another person fear, distress, anxiety, depression, and humiliation. This form of abuse can be more challenging to identify. Some examples include:

name-calling
screaming, cursing, insulting someone when angry
constant criticism and nit-picking
mocking someone's accomplishments
insulting their intelligence
isolating someone from friends and family
downplaying the other person's feelings or gaslighting them
controlling one's whereabouts, movements, and stalking their location
manipulating someone into doing things they don't want to do
instilling guilt and shame in another person

FINANCIAL ABUSE

Financial Abuse is using economic resources as a tool for manipulation and establishing control. This can include:

restricting access to money
not allowing the person to work
forcing someone to work without pay
stealing the other person's paycheck or inheritance, or withholding their access to it
taking someone's credit card and making large purchases to damage the score
taking out loans and acquiring debt in someone's name without their permission

SEXUAL ABUSE

Sexual Abuse is sexual behavior or contact that occurs without the consent of a person. Examples include:

any unwanted sexual touching
rape or attempted rape
unwanted sexual comments or harassment
pressuring someone to participate in sexual acts
making someone feel guilty for refusing sexual contact
pressuring or forcing someone to exchange sexual photos or view explicit content
sexual contact while a person in intoxicated and unable to give consent

*Important note: The status of one's relationship does not excuse any of the above behaviors. Sexual abuse can occur even within a marital relationship

SPIRITUAL ABUSE

Spiritual Abuse is the misuse of religious or spiritual beliefs as a form of manipulation or control. Examples include:

Citing religious texts or authority to justify controlling behavior
Mocking a person's religious or spiritual beliefs or practices
Forcing or coercing someone to participate in religious practices when they don't want to
Preventing someone from engaging in religious practices they believe in
Using threats of punishment from a higher power as a scare tactic
Isolating someone from their religious community to cut off their support system

*Important note: Spiritual abuse between family members or partners can occur whether or not they hold the same religious beliefs.

How to Help a Friend

If you suspect your friend could be in an abusive relationship, it might be difficult to know what to do. They may not even see the abuse, or possibly think it's their fault. Let's take a look at some ways to support a friend while avoiding judgement or insensitivity.

BELIEVE THEM

DON'T JUDGE THEM

Don’t criticize them for staying. It takes time for someone to leave an unhealthy relationship, so let them know that you’ll support them whatever they decide to do.

Several domestic violence centers and hotlines state that research shows it takes survivors an average of 4-7 attempts before permanently leaving an abusive relationship.

If you have a friend facing a situation like this, give them grace, patience, and empathy.

STAY IN TOUCH

"WHAT DO YOU NEED?"

LET THEM KNOW TMWF IS HERE

SIGNS OF AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

How Abuse Affects Children

Even brief exposure to abusive relationships can deeply disrupt a child's development and leave lasting scars. Abuse impacts every child differently. By understanding their unique experiences, we can support them better with compassionate care and coping skills.

DID YOU KNOW?

SHORT-TERM EFFECTS

Children who are exposed to family violence are likely to remain on edge and develop anxiety or anti-social traits. These children often blame themselves for abuse occurring in the household, which can negatively impact their self-esteem.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is a common effect on children who are exposed to abuse. In the case that they’re spared from physical abuse, continuously witnessing it can cause dangerous changes to the developing brain such as nightmares, change in sleep patterns, anger, and difficulty concentrating.

LONG-TERM EFFECTS

If a child is raised in an anxiety-inducing abusive environment, they may grow to become a depressed and traumatized adult.

Witnessing repetitive domestic violence can place children at high risk of developing depression, concentration issues, and other mental health risks as they become an adult.

It also affects one's impression of what a "normal" relationship and household looks like, and increases the likelihood of someone continuing the cycle of abuse my modeling what they know.

SIGNS OF CHILD ABUSE

What is Domestic & Family Violence?

What are the Forms of Abuse?

How to Help a Friend

How Abuse Affects Children

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